u wonder everyday,
at tis pt in ur life,
how much u'll swirl wif the winds of change.
u dream & u wonder,
& u dont believe,
yet know it all too soon,
tt u're being propelled towards ur new beginnin
wif each piece of memory u relive or future u imagine.
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u stop viewin time as the present moving forward
& devouring the future;
u rebel at its slowness
& yet at the same time,
fear its swiftness.
time becomes 2 things at once -
the conquerin present capturin the future,
& yet, the present conquered & captured,
& carried off by the past.
& u're weavin in & out of the pages of ur life,
all at once
desperately clingin onto fragments of yesterday,
desperately wantin to turn the next page,
desperately wantin to be able to stand still for a moment
to watch the world pass by ...
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u feel as if u're watchin
ppl disconnect themselves from u,
ur life & go away,
forever more out of ur reach.
mesmerized, all u can do is
... watch them & suffer ...
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nostalgia is the path upon which u tread,
sensin that life around u
is somehow changin,
not quite knowin how yet knowin,
not quite all too well,
that u'll return to find things different,
life having worn itself around the gap u left,
a life u almost wish to return to
yet u painfully know
u cannot.
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u realise, during those beautiful moments
u wish to cling onto,
that reality is no longer wat it was when it was;
it cant be reconstructed,
it cant exist outside of the precise moment
it took place.
u realise life is an unending series of unique wanves
crashin upon the shore,
one after another;
swash & backwash advancin & recedin;
here & there leavin traces of washes before,
inherently & inexplicably mixed together
yet never quite the same as the ones
that preceeded it.
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too soon, all too soon,
time is flying by,
& all i can do is
watch the world spinning past,
watchin it
& remembering ...
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THAT LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL :)
